Is your mindset blocking you from achieving the goals you have set for yourself and your business?
Recently I tweeted:
Even if you have the best systems/growth strategies in place – without the right mindset [attitude] you can still struggle in your business
… as it is something I believe to be both profound and true. And, it is something I also struggled with for many years.
When talking about your mindset, I’m referring to your attitude – your frame of mind. It’s that voice inside your head that is fuelled by your beliefs – the set of rules by which you live your daily life, and which governs and affects your thoughts, emotions, actions AND ultimately your outcomes.
While your inner voice can be empowering, positive and uplifting and will support you in moving forward with clarity and confidence, your voice can unfortunately also be unhelpful, disempowering and negative – therefore keeping you stuck and unable to reach your goals.
Over the last 15 years, from my own experience and through working with my clients I have identified 7 common self-beliefs that prevent people from reaching their personal and business goals. See how many you recognise.
1. Self-Discrimination
You think: “I’m just not good enough…”
The barrier of self-discrimination is where you are extremely judgemental and critical of your work.
You set your benchmarks so high that what you end up doing is setting yourself up for failure because you cannot possibly reach the level of expectations and demands that you place on yourself.
2. Self-Doubt
You think: “Others can do it – but I can’t…”
The barrier of self-doubt has you disbelieving that you have the skills, talents, strengths and any real value that you can offer your clients.
While it is possible to see the strengths in others, you believe that it’s impossible for you because you have this underlying doubt that you have the talent and skills that others have.
3. Self-Dismissal
You think and say: “Oh that? It was nothing – anyone can do it…”
Whenever someone gives you a compliment or makes a comment about one of your successes the self-belief barrier of dismissal automatically causes you to devalue and under-rate your ability by either dismissing or making light of their praise.
4. Self-Denial
You think: “I don’t deserve it…”
The barrier of self-denial is the belief that you don’t deserve success, happiness, wealth or success within your life or business.
You don’t believe that you are good enough or that you can achieve your goals because deep down for some reason, you don’t believe that you merit this success.
5. Self-Deprivation
You think: “My needs aren’t important…”
The barrier of self-deprivation is where you put everyone’s needs before your own. This barrier is also the reason why you may be letting other people take advantage of you, your time and your resources.
The demands and expectations of being a mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend, colleague (the list can go on) can be extremely demanding and if you have the self-belief of “My needs are not important” then you will constantly put yourself last. This ultimately leads to exhaustion and if you’re not careful – burn out.
6. Self-Disregard
You think: “I’m not worthy…”
The barrier of self-disregard is similar to self-denial where for some reason you don’t believe that you are worthy of success and/or fulfilment.
This can tend to show up as the constant downplaying and discounting of your achievements and the value you offer to your clients and preventing yourself from achieving your goals because of your feelings of unworthiness.
7. Self-Disempowerment
You think: “I’ve failed – again!”
The barrier of self-disempowerment is where you focus only on what didn’t go as planned; you notice when things go wrong and the things that failed.
When you constantly focus on the negative things and the things that go wrong, you dampen all hope of being able to recognise the things that went right; and the things you should be proud of.
While the reasons that cause us to develop these beliefs are different for everyone, sometimes they may be deep-seated and require coaching to address the event that caused you to develop that self-belief.
However, there are some practical steps you can take to challenge these beliefs and therefore stop negative thoughts and self-sabotaging behaviours in their tracks so that you don’t continue to cripple your business’s growth.
If this is something you’re struggling with and you recognise it’s been holding you back – let’s talk!
Annemarie, I can identify with these barriers in my life. No more for 2011. Thanks for sharing. Many will benefit from this article and what you have to offer in days to come.
Hi Claudia, thanks for stopping by and commenting.
Here’s to breaking through barriers in 2011 and reaching ALL of your business goals!!
Best, Annemarie
Great to have all the barriers listed in one place, as a check list! The one that tends to slip past us the easiest is the self-dismissal one … what passes as modesty is really a bad habit that undermines self-esteem. Terrific article, thanks!
It’s so easy to fall into a pit of despair and self doubt if you are not prepared. This is a great post to help anyone stay on guard and motivated! Keep up the good work!
Thanks Knikkolette, it certainly is very easy to fall into this cycle. I know as women (and I speak personally as well), we are often our worst critic and the reason why we block ourselves from sharing our amazing gifts and talents with the world. Hopefully this post will help people to take a step back and say “You know what? Enough already!! I’m ready to deal with this once and for all – no more!” Once they do – it’s amazing what can happen…
Thanks again for stopping by – I really appreciate it!
Blessings, Annemarie
It’s great to see this in writing. It’s so easy to be self-critical and self-depreciating. Just seeing these ideas listed out in print helps to reduce their power. As ‘thoughts’ they seem to be ‘the truth’ but written out, it’s easier to question it and say, “Is that REALLY true?” Is it REALLY true that anyone can do it? Is it REALLY true that I don’t deserve it (even though I worked really hard)? Like monsters that seem big and scary, they shrink and lose their power when light is shed on them. Thanks for writing this post!
Hi Cathy, you’re so welcome. I really appreciate you sharing your comments.
Here’s to shrinking those big and scary ‘negative self-belief’ monsters. We’re worth so much more!
Thank you for this list. I makes me aware of my own (dis)beliefs. Gonna work on some of them.
You’re so welcome Sharita. Glad you found them helpful!! Mindset (self-belief) is everything and will impact your results. Here’s to developing an amazing abundance of self belief!! Blessings.
Oh shoot! I’m 7 for 7 to one extent or another! I’ve got some work to do. Great tips, as always, Annemarie.
I think we can all relate to these 7 things Cyndee. A great reminder for us all!
So many people think it is always better to put others in front of yourself…the challenge is that you can be so much happier, productive and helpful if you take the time and make sure you get your life in order each day first. Great post.
Hi Jeff, I love your reminder of “taking time and making sure we get our lives in order each day first” – this is so very important!!